Happenings

Well, there's been a lot going around here lately. The roadbed is nearly complete, and we are gearing up to bring in a whole lot of dirt. After the dirt is put in place, we will begin the long and arduously exciting job of laying track. A recent grant has infused us with just enough money to make things move. We're still a long way from being profitable, but it's a start!

It's not all fun and games here, though. The fine folks at the Immigration and Naturalization Service recently raided our shop. As it turns out, the Chucky doll that had recently been promoted to the shop foreman position was actually made in Taiwan and lacked the proper paperwork to be gainfully employed in the United States. He has subsequently been deported, and the BCRR was forced to pay $1.37 in fines. 

Hayato the ninja mouse was terminated after he was caught pilfering peanut butter from various mousetraps on the property. Management has demanded that he vacate the property immediately, however, no one can find him.

With the recent personnel changes, Christoph, VP of Human resources, has asked me to pass on the following press release:

"NOW HIRING! THE BEECHER CITY RAILROAD HAS IMMEDIATE OPENINGS FOR THE FOLLOWING POSITIONS:

IN-HOUSE NINJA

THIS POSITION REQUIRES THAT THE APPLICANT BE FULLY TRAINED AND EXPERIENCED. JOB REQUIREMENTS INCLUDE DISAPPEARING AT THE SLIGHTEST HINT OF WORK, LEAVING OBSCURE MESSAGES IN RANDOM PLACES, AND ACTING GENERALLY WEIRD EVEN WHEN NO ONE IS LOOKING.

MANIACAL SHOP FOREMAN

THIS POSITION REQUIRES THAT THE APPLICANT HAVE A PHD IN SOMETHING NO ONE HAS HEARD OF. PASSING KNOWLEDGE OF RAILROADS A PLUS. STOCK OF MINIONS/HENCHMEN PREFERRED BUT NOT REQUIRED. JOB REQUIREMENTS INCLUDE COMING UP WITH AND FAILING TO EXECUTE RIDICULOUS "EVIL" PLOTS, YELLING INCOHERENTLY AT UNDERPAID MINIONS, AND MANIC GIGGLING. LOTS OF GIGGLING.

CAPS LOCK REPAIR PERSON

EXPERIENCE REQUIRED

ALL JOB POSITIONS INCLUDE A FREE HAM SANDWICH* UPON HIRING! 

*WHILE SUPPLIES LAST"

More as it develops.